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some days I drink water (everyday, actually)

I like my water fizzy. Tap water is a little too blah. My personality requires me to be just a bit ’extra’ so I can feel like I’m fulfilling the role my parents made me for, which is artist. All things considered I haven't done so well being an artist myself. I’ve supported artists, like the years spent co-managing Pizzicato Five: https://youtu.be/QNl4vX7jF4Y(I was backstage breathing a sigh of relief) I’ve
morning coffee
politics

Stuff that keeps the panic away

Not completely away, if I’m honest. But far enough that, if I look with my spiritual eye — the one that can hardly see with because of older age and a bunch of other things — I can take that breath that lets me decide to look away. I’ve spent too much time looking too deeply into what being American actually means. And it broke a bunch of things in me. Some expectations gentled